5 Things to Do When Your Baby is Refusing to Eat

Today, I'm going to show you five things you can do when your baby starts refusing their food, throwing things down, or refusing the things they used to love. I'm going to show you five things you can start doing right now. Just in case, my name is Lindsay and welcome to the Little Foundations Channel, where I help parents and caregivers create healthy habits for their babies from the very start.

First, let me say that it's normal that your baby will get to this stage. It's normal in their development that they want a little bit more independence and sometimes they become a little bit more opinionated. Sometimes it's out of nowhere; they might start refusing all the things that you're offering, even things they used to really love. I'm going to show you things that we can do to avoid meltdowns and start to make this a happy experience again.

Number one, I call this "Lovingly Ignore". What you're going to do when your baby starts refusing is that we're going to lovingly ignore them. Sometimes, once your baby has been eating for a little while, they want a little bit more independence. And when they were so little, we were feeding them so often, watching their every move, and making sure that they liked everything. Now, they're looking for a little bit more space, a little bit more breathing room.

So sometimes, I'll say to families, pretend that you're ignoring them. Always watch them and make sure that they're safe, but talk to other people in the house or turn away and pretend that you're having a conversation, start to wash the dishes, or have to leave the room for a second. You can watch them from behind or watch them out of the corner of your eye to make sure that they're safe. But sometimes, once we start to lovingly ignore them for a short time, you will see that they will start to explore the food because we're not watching them like a hawk. So don't be afraid to give them a little bit of space.

Number two, I call this "The Drive-Through". Say that your baby has been having a little bit of a hard time eating; they're refusing things, they're throwing it down, but you do think that they're really hungry. So what you can do is drop off a little bit of food and keep on going. That's why I call it the drive-through. I'm gonna stop by, drop off a few things, and I'm going to keep on going.

And that helps in two ways- That helps to give them that space and that independence that we talked about, and it helps to give them a little bit of food. We're not overwhelming them; we're not giving them a ton of food, and we're not wasting the things that they are throwing down. But if there are a few things that you can drop off, a few little pieces of foods or different kinds of foods, drop off a few and keep on going.

Number three, I call this a "Cocktail Party". Sometimes, if your baby is in a mood and they're not feeling great, another thing that you can do is pre-load some forks and spoons for them. So if they have a little piece of food that they like, you can pre-load it on the fork for them and again, drop it off, turn away, or just keep walking and give them that space. That way, it's already on the fork, and they can pick it up and put it in their mouth. That is one more thing that we can help them with.

Number four, this is a hard one. But sometimes we have to "Play It Cool". Sometimes your baby, especially when they've been eating for a little while, they're looking for that independence but maybe they don't have a ton of words yet or haven't found a great way to communicate with you. They're feeling frustrated, and they're going to show you that they're frustrated. They're going to throw their food down or scream and shout and try to get out. But if you feel like your baby's being a little bit fussy but they really do want to eat, don't be afraid to play it cool. Try these other tips, give them some space, give them small amounts of food. But then also give them a little bit more room to be independent.

Even when you're so frustrated and you see the food is going on the floor and all this food that they used to like is now wasted, play it cool. This is temporary, and if we have a big reaction to them throwing that down, not only is it going to turn into a back-and-forth game for a short time, but then things might escalate, and then you'll be frustrated, and they will feel that frustration. And now, this is not a happy mealtime. So don't be afraid to fake it till you make it, play it cool, and give them some space. This is a short-term thing, and it will get better.

Now that your baby is older, we can go right into number five, "Little Jobs". I love to give kids little jobs around this time when they're growing more. We can find things developmentally appropriate for them. We can find out where they are in their age and stage and how they can be involved in the meal prep and the shopping and the cleaning up. So we can find things that they can do to help you and to feel more involved and more independent, which is what they're looking for.

One of the best things you can do when they're really little is have them help you clean the tray when you're all done. Give them a cloth and show them how to wipe down their tray or hold them in your arms and carry them over to put their plate in the sink. As your child starts to get older, they'll be able to have more responsibilities around food. Soon you'll have a big kid who can help to scoop out food to other family members or help you with your shopping list.

These are really great reminders to give your child a little bit more independence around food. Sometimes when the food just shows up on their tray, they really feel like they don't have any control. When we're standing there watching them hoping that they're going to eat, they're looking for a little bit more space. And these are the things that we can do to help give them a little bit more control, a little bit of independence. For your little one, a little bit goes a long way. You've got this. Let me know how it's going and reach out. I am always here to help. And for more baby feeding tips, check this one.